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Two decades ago, I found myself in an emotional situation I had never experienced before. It was 1986 and I was living in a small town in western Massachusetts. On the eve of my senior year, I received a phone call from my sister, telling me that my 9-year-old sister had recently passed away. She had been in a car accident just three months earlier, and I had not heard from her since.
My first instinct was to react like many other people, as I’m sure everyone would have: with anxiety, fear, and pain. But my reaction to my little sister’s death wasn’t like that. My initial reaction was something completely different.
I laughed.
My sister was always quite a bit older than me, and she was in 4th grade when I was in 3rd. So in a way, she was my older sister as well. She had a tendency to boss me around, making me the little one in the family. Even at that young age, I was able to laugh at her in a friendly way and occasionally give her a good smack in the head if she really had her way. But the fact was that I loved her dearly. I was her big brother, and when she died, I realized that she would always be my big sister.
When I laughed at the phone call, I didn’t laugh with the hope of releasing my emotions; I laughed because I felt like she would be okay. Sure, she had some broken bones and she was still recovering, but she would be fine.
Now that I look back on the situation, I can’t imagine a better way to deal with the death of a sibling. Siblings are closely tied to each
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